~ Unfathomable Podcast ~

There are some things in this world that are just unfathomable.

Including:

  • That which we cannot always see or easily understand
  • That which is under the surface or part of a greater mystery
  • That which we crave to understand in our desire to connect
  • That which speaks to the human heart

Whether you are exploring a new area of life, dealing with immeasurable loss and grief, wondering about the universe, finding your own spirituality, or searching for that something “more,” this podcast is for you.

The Pathless Path Series:
On Love and Loss, Grief and Renewal, Sorrow and Spirit

Losing someone you love sucks. Grieving is hard. It can leave you feeling isolated, lost and lonely, especially in a society that does not understand how to deal with grief and does not want to honor it or acknowledge what you are feeling.

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If you have lost someone you love and are grieving or if you seek to give comfort and solace to someone who grieves, then tune in and join Elizabeth Welles, a long-time writer, storyteller, and guide, as she shares her stories and experience of grief, and offers insights on grieving in our world today.

Elizabeth shares her personal experience of traumatic grief while shining a light on the cultural paradigms and platitudes that further hurt the grieving.

In her stories, people have found comfort and validation that helps them feel less alone in this universal journey we all take. And if someone you love is grieving, this podcast will help you listen and respond to them with greater sensitivity, in a more kind and loving way.

Episode 1

Episode 1 Notes & Highlights

Podcast Episode One
(Originally recorded April 2019)

Highlights from Podcast Episode One:

“When we can’t be true to what is in ourselves and safely reveal ourselves to one another, then we are split into two or into a thousand pieces more. When grief is not shared or witnessed or seen, it breaks
the human heart more…

“Give sorrow words, the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er fraught heart and bids it break” ~ William Shakespeare.

“Sometimes I think the collective grievers of this world weep for the unshed tears of others who do not know how to be with grief. We weep for their losses that remain ungrieved, pushed aside, disenfranchised in this world. And what a world it is…

“And often the tears are not pure grief. They are mixed with love and some strange joy that I don’t even understand but other people have said they sense in me when I cry so deeply.”

Companioning Philosophy
Dr. Wolfelt’s 11 Tenets of Caring for the Bereaved
by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
www.centerforloss.com

1. Companioning is about being present to another person’s pain; it is not about taking away the pain.

2. Companioning is about going to the wilderness of the soul with another human being; it is not about thinking you are responsible for finding the way out.

3. Companioning is about honoring the spirit; it is not about focusing on the intellect.

4. Companioning is about listening with the heart; it is not about analyzing with the head.

5. Companioning is about bearing witness to the struggles of others; it is not about judging or directing these struggles.

6. Companioning is about walking alongside; it is not about leading or being led.

7. Companioning means discovering the gifts of sacred silence; it does not mean filling up every moment with words.

8. Companioning the bereaved is about being still; it is not about frantic movement forward.

9. Companioning is about respecting disorder and confusion; it is not about imposing order and logic.

10. Companioning is about learning from others; it is not about teaching them.

11. Companioning is about curiosity; it is not about expertise.

Episode 2

Episode 2 Notes & Highlights

Podcast Episode Two
(Originally recorded May 2019)

Highlights from Podcast Episode Two:

Download the PDF “Love Holds Me”
Print it out and laminate it, and put it where you can see it to remind yourself that love holds you.

“The form changed … but the relationship continues on and expands and can even deepen…

“You have always been on the pathless path. There is no path from here to here, from there to here, from here to there, from here to here. How can there be when we are always here. There is no path for you. Only to realize that from here to here is already here.”

“Create spaciousness for them by a presence, by a sacred space … be with someone in their grief and suffering.”

“When your loved one leaves physically, you feel alone. When you say to someone I don’t want to be here, they get scared … they think what does she mean? Is she going to lie down and go to sleep? Is she going to take her own life? No. That’s not what it means.”

“Yeah, sometimes you don’t want to be here and it’s a part of grief and it’s a part that needs to be spoken to and given voice. It’s better to give it voice than to keep it tucked in one’s own heart.”

“I don’t move on from. I don’t move on from my mother or father or best friends, who have all passed. I move on with … we move on with our loved ones.”

For information on Elizabeth Welles’ art, words and images, please visit www.elizabethwelles.com

Love Holds Me
By Elizabeth Welles

Download the PDF “Love Holds Me”
Print it out and laminate it, and put it where you can see it to remind yourself that love holds you.

Episode 3

Episode 3 Notes & Highlights

Episode #3 Notes & Highlights

For artwork and poems shared in this podcast, please contact Elizabeth Welles on her
Contact Page.

How do you start to feel tethered again?
Learn about how ancestors sometimes come to help!

A Little Bit About Secondary Loss:

Secondary loss zaps your concentration, your energy, and your motivation to want to do
anything at all. Secondary loss includes the dreams you previously had for yourself or your loved one. Your entire life’s perspective may change. It may all go poof into thin air and you may not know who you are anymore.

Fear, anxiety and terror may suddenly creep into your day or explode full on into your
life minute by minute upon awakening. So that you feel alone on an island or on a boat adrift out to sea.

You can’t push someone into better or to move through grief into some other mythical happy side of it because there’s no other side to get to, it’s a part of life. Validation is huge.

Tears of grief are often mixed with tears of love.
There is no letting go, there is only a letting be (artwork available)
I am a Feather (artwork available)

Can You Trust That Everything Is All Right?

Our Collective Grief

Notes & Highlights

Our Collective Grief was written and recorded after the murder of George Floyd.

www.ElizabethWelles.com

 

Episode 4

Episode 4 Notes & Highlights

Episode #4 Notes & Highlights

“Sometimes after loss we hear things differently…

People want us to have moved on, gotten better, gotten over it, but when you have lost the person who is your soul there is no moving on except with them. You never move on from them. There is no getting better, because you were never sick. You are grieving…

What happens is we start to feel more isolated and lonely…
We don’t want our grief managed or to be put under a microscope.

It’s the resistance to difficult emotion that presents the difficulty. We live in a culture that wants us to be happy like we are going to meet happiness on the other side of grief. We live in a culture that is swept into excessive positivity…”

For information on Elizabeth Welles’ art, words and images, please visit www.elizabethwelles.com

You can also listen to this podcast and see the episode notes for this episode at: https://elizabethwelles.com/podcast/

Episode 5

Episode 5 Notes & Highlights

On God & Grief 

Why using God to give comfort to a grieving person is not always the best thing to do — unless you know, deeply, the trajectory of their faith, and grief.

Join Elizabeth’s newsletter to be notified of when her next podcast will be available and to receive word of her courses, and her live webinars and workshops:
www.ElizabethWelles.com

For poems or art shared in this podcast, please contact Elizabeth Welles on her Contact Page.

Be An Empty Vessel
by Elizabeth Welles 

A wife asked her husband, “What do I do for my friend when I visit her? She grieves her mother much.”
The husband asked the mother, “What does my wife do for your daughter?”

The departed Mother’s Soul answered,
“There is nothing for your wife to do. Just go there and be with my daughter and love her.”

When you see grieving friends, leave behind your brandishing swords of earthly wisdom:
“All things are for your growth,” or “hope for a better day.”

Leave behind your healing ways.
Advice-giving, fix-it tools with your desire to relieve suffering.

Even the greatest of healers say foolish things.
Be silent before your grieving people,
Words are useless here.

You know little of the mysteries of death and the sacrament of sorrow.

Instead bow before grieving loved ones,

Be an empty vessel in their presence,
And you will have given everything to them

In Love.

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